I moved my sensor on Monday morning because I was sick of the wonky results and wanted to start fresh. (It’s going better by the way.) So there I was, standing in front of my bathroom mirror, with this in front of me.

It’s pretty daunting for the first time. It’s not a small needle that inserts the sensor wire and the fact that you have to shoot it into yourself at high speed at a 45 degree angle makes me nauseous. But – onward! I need to figure this out.

I load the sensor into the blue gun (because I have no other adequate description for it). This is after I drop the sensor about 3 times trying to remember how to load it into said gun. Sigh. If I didn’t observe the 5 second rule, I’d probably be out a whole box of sensors by now. (Shh…)

Anyway, peeling away the tape replays the Metronic reminder video in my head. “Don’t insert the sensor at any more than a 60 degree angle, for it could cause bleeding and discomfort.” Fine, whatever. I suck at geometry so it’s all going to hell anyway.

The loaded gun replays another image in my head – the one my trainer gave me.

Oh – hey, the sensor kit looks like a hummingbird and you have to make sure the head is loaded properly before inserting.

animals.howstuffworks.com

Well, that’s a nice pleasant image right? A pretty, calm hummingbird that’s about to be jammed into your abdomen? Psh. Honestly, I think it looks like this.

Michigan.gov

See? Waaaaayyy more accurate.

And for good reason.

Despite my best efforts, my hand jumped slightly upon insertion, thus resulting in more than a 45 degree angle at placement, bleeding and the sensation that I’m being poked whenever I bend in half. (And I’m a dancer… we do things like that. A lot.)

I need more practice.